Realizing the Importance of Men in My Life
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Chapter 1: The Value of Companionship
The insights I've gained from my experiences have led me to understand just how significant men can be in a woman's life. Benjamin Franklin once noted that “marriage is…the most natural state of man," suggesting that a union between a man and a woman creates a more complete human experience. He argued that individual men and women, when united, are more likely to thrive and find happiness together. A man on his own lacks the completeness that partnership can provide, much like one half of a pair of scissors.
As I navigated various social situations, I found myself increasingly uncomfortable with the way conversations often turned sexual. It became clear to me that being a single woman in certain environments could send mixed signals, potentially undermining my intentions, especially as I engage in community activism.
One rainy day, while sitting at the bus stop, I was overwhelmed with emotion. Tears streamed down my face as I reflected on two critical questions: Are my expectations of men fair? Do I truly want to continue living my life in solitude?
Years ago, I came across a thought-provoking statement: “Would you prefer to be the cherished property of one man or the unclaimed interest of many?” While it's essential to assert that women are not possessions, it’s undeniable that this perception has lingered in society for a long time.
My desire for a man goes beyond mere physical safety. I consider myself a romantic at heart, yearning for love and nurturing rather than rejection. To better understand the dynamics between women and men, I conducted some research.
Findings
The results revealed that married individuals are often viewed more favorably than those who are single. According to a 2022 General Social Survey (GSS), happiness levels are strongly correlated with marriage and family life. The survey indicated that married women aged 18-55 reported higher happiness levels than their unmarried counterparts.
Interestingly, while many women claimed to feel “pretty happy,” the disparity for those who identified as “very happy” was striking: 40% of married women with children reported high levels of happiness, compared to 25% of married women without children, 22% of unmarried women without children, and just 17% of unmarried women with children.
Women typically seek specific character traits in men such as confidence, trustworthiness, emotional availability, and kindness. A supportive partner can foster a sense of belonging and validation in a woman's life.
While reflecting on this, I received a text from a man I previously mentioned in my article about the male gaze and its implications.
The first video, How Loneliness Makes Men More Addicted, explores how loneliness affects men and their behaviors in relationships.
I read his message, which expressed regret and acknowledged my value as a classy woman. He admitted to his shortcomings and is making efforts to improve. Even if it's not him, I recognize the need for the presence of a man who embodies the qualities I admire.
After accepting his apology, we met and shared a heartfelt embrace. That moment brought me a sense of peace, reinforcing the belief that things would be alright.
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Chapter 2: The Impact of Loneliness
The second video, Male Loneliness: How Being Lonely Is Negatively Impacting Men, delves into the effects of loneliness on men and their relationships.