How Will Children Recall the Pandemic in Years to Come?
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Chapter 1: Understanding Childhood Memories
When I was nearly six, the Gulf War erupted. International forces engaged in conflict in Iraq, leading to missile strikes on Israel. I can still hear the sirens and recall donning the gas mask distributed to protect against potential chemical attacks. I remember dashing to the “sealed room”—my parents' bedroom, where the windows were taped shut to guard against nerve gas. An unfinished dinner featuring my favorite dish was interrupted by those sirens, and I ended up munching on cookies while sheltering instead.
Interestingly, I don't recall feeling afraid. I must have been scared, but that emotion eludes me. The fragments of memories I possess are devoid of emotional attachments, both positive and negative. To me, the Gulf War was an exhilarating adventure, even if that wasn't the reality at the time.
This reflection leads me to consider my eldest daughter, who is now the same age I was during that tumultuous period. We both navigated significant life disruptions at the age of five—me during a war, and her amid a pandemic. Both experiences are rife with uncertainty and fear, challenging for any child to fully grasp. So, how will my children and kids globally remember this era?
Current research on when children start to form memories remains inconclusive. It's commonly believed that most adults' first long-term memories surface around the age of 3.5 years. As we age, our ability to create and retrieve memories improves. A study from 1962 demonstrated this in rats, where younger rats forgot a learned fear more quickly than older ones.
This observation prompted researchers to ponder whether younger children struggle to form lasting memories or if they create them but later forget them as they develop. The phenomenon of childhood amnesia has been a focal point of study for over a century. Experts believe that while infants and toddlers can indeed form memories, these recollections are often fragile and later lost, though the underlying reason remains unclear.
A 2011 study indicated that young children can recall early memories; however, these are typically replaced as the child matures. By around age 10, memories become more stable and accessible into adulthood.
There are two primary types of long-term memory: semantic and episodic. Semantic memory encompasses general knowledge and ideas. For example, it’s how we remember that the color orange exists or that the Covid-19 pandemic occurred. In contrast, episodic memory pertains to personal experiences, such as my enjoyment of the color orange or my feelings of sadness while navigating a lockdown in London.
Creating episodic memories is more complex and often harder to access. Research using brain imaging has shown that recalling an episodic memory activates the same brain regions that were engaged in its formation, leading to what some call “mental time travel.” Experts suggest that while very young children can create episodic memories, they may lose them over time due to their complexity. Mark Reinecke, clinical director at the Child Mind Institute, noted that singular non-traumatic events typically do not have a lasting impact on children's emotional development, highlighting their resilience.
However, traumatic experiences, such as losing a loved one to Covid-19, can leave a more lasting imprint even on younger children. But for those who experienced the pandemic without any personal trauma, their memories will largely depend on their parents' handling of the situation.
Reflecting on the Gulf War, two studies attempted to assess how children recalled their experiences. Both found that the intensity of memories and symptoms diminished over time, although children from families lacking cohesion or with a parent struggling psychologically were more prone to post-traumatic symptoms and negative memories.
Dr. Gene Beresin, a psychiatry professor at Harvard University, remarked that the stress surrounding the coronavirus may influence how sensitive children remember this period, largely based on their parents' responses. In essence, younger children's memories of this time will be shaped by their parents' coping mechanisms, implying that parents can help mitigate the trauma of this experience.
So how can we approach this? While it's essential not to mislead children about the harsh realities of the pandemic, we can frame our discussions positively. Here are some strategies to help turn the pandemic into a less daunting memory for our kids:
- Open Communication: Engage with your children about the pandemic. Discuss what has happened and how they feel. Parent-child reminiscing can aid emotional growth and foster healthier memories.
- Highlight Positives: Acknowledge the difficulties of this time but also emphasize the good aspects. Kim Roberts, a psychology professor, suggests that families can help children view the pandemic through a more positive lens, noting the many commendable actions taken during this period.
- Establish Routines: During lockdowns, millions in the U.K. participated in weekly clapping for caregivers, creating a sense of routine and community. My children looked forward to these moments, which they now remember fondly.
- Encourage Documentation: Suggest that your children keep journals to process their feelings and capture their experiences. As many memories can be fleeting, having written records can help solidify their recollections.
- Promote Relaxation: While this can be challenging, parents play a crucial role in shaping their children's long-term memories. Creating a calm and emotionally healthy environment will significantly influence how children remember this period.
The first video titled "Kids Will Remember this Pandemic Differently Than You May Think" explores the various ways children might recall their experiences during the pandemic, emphasizing the importance of parental influence on memory formation.