Chapter 1: Understanding Your Triggers

We all have specific trigger points in our lives, often without realizing it. Certain individuals can repeatedly annoy or hurt us through their statements or actions. Psychologist Robert Betz refers to these individuals as "ass angels." In this post, we will delve into what this term means and how to uncover the valuable lessons these "ass angels" can offer us.

Additionally, a podcast episode related to this topic is available on Spotify, iTunes, or directly on the blog.

Take the case of Marie, who completed a self-love course and shared her experiences with me.

Marie identifies her "ass angels" as:

• A colleague who constantly interrupts her, dismissing her opinions.
• A neighbor who barely acknowledges her presence.
• A friend who makes plans without considering Marie's preferences.
• Occasionally, her husband, who returns home, greets her briefly, and then focuses solely on the television.

These "ass angels" hit Marie's sore spots.

Marie revealed that, growing up in a household with four siblings, she often felt overlooked. "I rarely received undivided attention and often felt invisible," she shared, reflecting on her childhood.

These "ass angels" in her current life echo those past wounds, reminding her of the feelings of neglect she experienced as a child. Their actions push Marie's buttons, revealing areas in need of healing.

Chapter 2: The Hidden Blessings of Ass Angels

You might wonder why these "ass angels" should be seen as gifts. The term itself combines two contrasting words: "ass," which denotes their irritating nature, and "angel," implying that they serve a purpose.

Their behavior highlights areas within us that require healing, awakening, or the release of limiting beliefs. By viewing their actions as invitations for growth and focusing on our painful experiences, we can slowly unveil the valuable lessons these "ass angels" provide.

Always keep in mind: what affects you also impacts others.

In the video "LSU Kim Mulkey LOSS to Iowa in Elite 8 postgame, Flau'jae, Angel Reese & Van Lith," you can gain additional insights into handling personal triggers and emotional responses.

Chapter 3: Identifying Your Ass Angels

To fully appreciate the gifts that "ass angels" can bring, it's essential to identify them in your life. Consider who consistently frustrates, undermines, or belittles you through their comments or actions. Reflect on the individuals who push your buttons with their dominance, selfishness, or criticism.

What specific behaviors do these "ass angels" exhibit that irritate you? Take a moment to consider what lessons they may be trying to impart.

Section 3.1: Accepting the Gifts of Your Ass Angels

While their actions may not initially seem like gifts, a deeper examination can reveal aspects within you that need attention. Here are three strategies to help you embrace what these "ass angels" offer:

1. Reflect on Their Actions: Do you allow yourself the same freedoms as your "ass angel"? For instance, if your friend acts selfishly, consider whether you also suppress your own needs.
2. Identify Triggering Beliefs: What emotions arise when your "ass angel" appears? What past experiences do these feelings evoke? Recognizing these beliefs can help you address them.
3. Learn from Their Behavior: When your "ass angel" disrupts your peace, think about how others remain unaffected. What skills or perspectives do they possess that you could adopt?

Section 3.2: The Path to Healing

As you start to uncover the roots of your triggers, the "ass angels" in your life will become less daunting, and their lessons will shine through. I wish you insight, compassion, and a gentle approach to healing your past wounds.