The Ultimate Self-Help Story You Didn't Know You Needed
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Chapter 1: A Journey Through Self-Help
Many claim that true transformation starts from within, but all I’ve got to show for it is a pocketful of lint.
Image by Riad Tchakou from Pixabay
While I could say I joined Medium for endless access to self-improvement tales, that would be a fib. Since dishonesty is a character flaw, I’d inevitably find myself sifting through the countless self-help articles—over 100,000 and still counting. This would inevitably lead me to explore the plethora of relationship stories, numbering over 2 million, and then onto psychology, with an astonishing 105 million entries dedicated to “positive change” to somehow fix my life.
But honestly, I’m not venturing down that rabbit hole. I just came here to read about pickleball.
Sure, those figures are ballpark estimates, but Medium is undeniably packed with a staggering amount of self-help content. I’ve had enough of it. Every attempt at self-improvement has led to unfortunate outcomes. For instance, I once read a piece (not from Medium) praising the virtues of walking barefoot on grass for benefits like enhanced body awareness and mental clarity. Intrigued, I decided to give it a try.
I drove to a park with lush grass, removed my shoes, and took about ten steps before stepping on a bumblebee. I yelped in pain and hopped back to my car—so much for mental clarity.
The reality is that narratives urging readers to abandon their vices can be quite hazardous—a notion Mark Twain seemed to grasp well. He recounted an encounter with a woman on a cruise who expressed her discontent with her health and sought his advice.
When Twain shared his experience of giving up smoking, drinking, and swearing for 30 days, she replied, “But I don’t do any of those things.” To which Twain sadly replied, “Then I can’t help you. You’ve got nothing to give up.”
Take Twain’s wisdom to heart: clean living is often overrated.
I once stumbled upon an article claiming that consuming grass juice could lead to a longer, healthier life. I thought, how difficult could it be?
It turned out to be quite challenging. The concoction I was served was a vibrant green, reminiscent of a barnyard. The first sip nearly made me gag. After three hours, I finally managed to down the entire drink and contemplated how to rid my mouth of the taste—my wife’s bathwater crossed my mind.
Closely related to these self-help narratives are the “back to nature” mantras. As someone who enjoys the outdoors, I can vouch for the joy of outdoor activities. However, claiming that stepping into the woods brings about profound self-discovery is a stretch.
Some people feel they’ve reached enlightenment in nature: “Here I am, surrounded by trees, feeling deeply connected to the universe… wait, is that a snake? Sweet Baby Jesus, get me out of here!”
My instinct is to declare the entire self-improvement movement as nonsense. Constantly striving to better oneself can foster a more egotistical mindset rather than diminish it. Attempting to embrace an ethereal concept often leads to self-absorption.
However, these stories attract a lot of views, prompting me to ponder, “How can I capitalize on this?”
This is a dilemma since offering life advice implies I’ve got everything figured out—something my wife might dispute, given the lack of evidence.
Nonetheless, I’ve brainstormed some potential titles for my own self-help article to boost my visibility:
“Read This Story and I’ll Let You Punch Me in the Face”
Simple, straightforward, and therapeutic.
“The Ultimate Guide to Making Your Life Suck”
Sets expectations low, and “ultimate” is a buzzword loved by self-help enthusiasts.
“How to Experience the Great Outdoors and Learn Nothing About Yourself”
Ideal for when an onslaught of mosquitoes interrupts your zen moment.
I’ll keep refining my ideas. If I can create the quintessential self-help article, maybe it will inspire other writers to shift their focus to more engaging subjects—like pickleball.
Robert E. Saunders claims to have lengthy discussions with the Dalai Lama and enjoys unique outdoor experiences, such as teaching a moose how to meditate. Follow him for more unconventional self-help insights (Saunders, not the moose—who's busy on Substack).
Chapter 2: The Self-Help Paradox
In this video titled "I Read 100 Self-Help Books - These 12 Changed My Life," the creator shares impactful lessons learned from various self-help books and discusses their transformative effects.
The second video, "I read 100 self help books and they ruined my life," explores the ironic consequences of excessive self-help reading, revealing how it can complicate rather than simplify one's life.