Chapter 1: Remembering Vovo

The late Vovo, my best friend Melanie’s mother, profoundly influenced my life before she passed away in June. After a six-year battle with cancer, Vovo remained an inspiring force, continually pushing forward despite her health challenges. She embraced life by adapting her lifestyle, exploring various treatments, and making future plans, embodying a spirit of resilience.

Amid the challenges, Vovo and her husband, Papa, were dedicated to building their new home, actively participating in the construction. She envisioned the house and played a significant role in its design, demonstrating her remarkable ability to create something from scratch. Vovo's determination was evident as she willed the house into existence.

During a difficult period in my life following my son's birth, Vovo reached out with a heartfelt letter, offering support. Having experienced the loss of her own son, she gained a new perspective on life. She emphasized that love was paramount, and that familial disagreements were trivial in comparison.

For a decade, Vovo sent my son a special Christmas package filled with books, toys, and treats, ensuring he felt cherished by his extended family. This past December, however, the familiar brown box from Florida was absent. The shock of losing her was immense, given her tenacity and strength.

Vovo taught me to live life unapologetically and on my own terms. Her legacy of boldness will continue to inspire me as I embrace 2022 and beyond, focusing on my writing and personal growth.

Chapter 2: Lessons from Mel Robbins

Shortly after Vovo's passing, Melanie shared a TED Talk featuring Mel Robbins. Unlike her usual pattern, she urged me to watch it immediately. This 2011 talk, titled “How to Stop Screwing Yourself Over,” has garnered over 28 million views and offers compelling insights.

In the talk, Mel Robbins poses a fundamental question: “What do you want?” She encourages the audience to identify their desires and articulate them, even if it feels selfish. This idea was a breakthrough for me, as I had often hesitated to voice my aspirations due to fear of failure and the daunting gap between my current situation and my goals.

Robbins emphasizes the importance of naming both the desire and the underlying reason for wanting it, even if it feels embarrassing. She urges listeners to take immediate action, no matter how small, to bridge the gap between intention and reality.

This concept resonated deeply with me. Overcoming internal resistance is crucial because our brains instinctively prefer safety and routine, even when those routines lead to unhappiness. To pursue my goals, I must push through discomfort, recognizing that growth often requires stepping outside my comfort zone.

Three Resolutions for Growth

Inspired by Mel Robbins, I set three resolutions, each linked to actionable steps:

1. Write a Children's Story: I am finally committing to writing the children's story I've dreamed of for years. This journey of discovery is essential, and I have enrolled in a six-month course to stay accountable.
2. Engage with the Writing Community: I plan to consistently contribute to Medium and connect with fellow writers, sharing my work with the world despite the risks of failure and self-doubt.
3. Cherish Time with My Mom: I will prioritize making this year special for my mother by calling her, visiting her in Florida, and finding ways to brighten her days. Whether through sharing photos or watching Netflix together, I aim to express my gratitude and love.

In addition, I look forward to visiting Mel in Florida, where we will enjoy hot dogs with Papa in Vovo’s backyard, feeling her presence as we reminisce about her vibrant spirit.

A heartfelt thanks to Robert Ralph for founding New Writers Welcome and fostering a supportive community for aspiring writers. I also appreciate the connections I've made with fellow writers: Jill, Linda Ng, Francesca Cadhit, Kris Bedenian, and Shruthi Rajaram.